Last night, Yezhong, Tim and I went to the Thai Buddhist Temple along Jalan Bukit Merah for a long-awaited reunion with our dear friend and fellow coach, Paiboon.
In June of last year, Paiboon started on a 3 month journey into monkhood that has now extended to 7 months. I was excited to see what changes Paiboon had made and why he had decided to remain a monk for more than twice the original time … but mostly I just missed my friend.
When we got to the temple, Paiboon walked out to greet us…what a surprise! You wouldn’t believe how much he’s slimmed down. Paiboon had always been a bit on the meaty side but now he was so lean! And that wasn’t the only thing that had changed.
As we sat down and began talking, I noticed how much more peaceful he seemed. He talked softer, and slower now, even though I could catch gleams of the old playful Paiboon from time to time. Both Yezhong and I felt it; his energy in the past used to be strongly outwardly directed, he was one of the most bubbly, enthusiastic and charismatic among us.
But now his energy feels a lot more strongly directed inside, and it’s tough to explain, but he feels more solid, more rooted as if his core had strengthened up. It was interesting because it was something that wasn’t there before.
And it wasn’t just an unwavering inner core I saw, it was a flexible core that refused to fight or be attached to a point of view. I was surprised how readily during a discussion he was to admit to differences instead of clinging to a point.
Throughout our too-short time together, he kept giving hints of the immense growth experiences he had in the past 7 months and encouraged us to pursue our own spiritual path to growth. Even as we were talking, he kept telling us how much he wished he could just show us the marvelous things he had seen, but he couldn’t; we could only truly know by experience, not talk.
He said he wanted to continue his learning experience as a monk because he felt he’d more to go. As we bid goodbye at the temple gates I couldn’t help but feel bittersweet feelings of joy and sadness, joy at my friend’s bravery towards walking his path, and sadness because I will miss him. I wanted to hug him, but the monk rules forbade it, so I did the best equivalent and gave him a bow.
Paiboon, you’re one of the most dedicated people I know to self-improvement and personal growth. I trust your choice and I wish you all the best. You are loved and missed.
Yezhong says
January 26, 2007 at 12:39 amIndeed the time with him was a little too short, but I guess we shouldn’t feel attach to it. 🙂
Regardless of his intent to tell us or show us, his stories and words still makes me wonder and reflect.
And all the best for your “pursuit”, Paiboon. (If that is even the right word to use)
Bren says
January 26, 2007 at 1:02 amHe lost 12 kg. I think the slimming centres can close down liao. lol
John Wesley says
January 27, 2007 at 1:55 amVery interesting story. I’ve often pondered what it would be like to give up the rat race on live a life of meditation and seclusion. Maybe one day I’ll try it.
Kloudiia says
January 27, 2007 at 2:25 amWow…
Bren says
January 27, 2007 at 11:03 pmHey ! Y did Uncle Pai Boon stand so near to Tim ? Haiz ! He asked me to stay @ least 1 human height away from him lei ! So unfair =p
Rachit says
January 28, 2007 at 6:47 pmOmg! Paiboon looks so slim and different.
At times, I envy the peace of mind he has attained … at other times, I admire his courage in leaving everything comfortable behind to go for something greater.
But I’m sure it’s possible to introduce some elements of “monkhood” into our regular lives too … and slowly & steadily we could gain some of the understandings he’s gotten.
Elona says
January 28, 2007 at 10:39 pmRachit, we can introduce some elements of “monkhood” into our regular lives. When we meditate we move away from the external world and enter the interior world. We are retreating for those 10, 20 or more minutes that we mediate. It’s amazing what meditation does for you, and you don’t have to meditate for hours to benefit. Someone, I can’t remember who once said the ten minutes you meditate is better than the 20 minutes you don’t. Even meditating while waiting for the traffic light to change has a positive effect. I look for opportunities to have mini meditation sessions( waiting in line, waiting on hold for someone on the phone etc.) and believe me they help my mental health. I don’t get stressed out nearly as much. I find I’m more tolerate and happier. It’s amazing, and I wouldn’t have believed it if I hadn’t tried it myself.
It’s really simple. I just count my out breaths one at a time from one to ten and then start over again. I’m sure it’s not obvious to anyone that I’m doing this because I’m not sitting in a lotus position on the floor while I count my breaths. I’m standing in line like anyone else.
Another way we can experience the monastic life is to go on a retreat. On retreat we are living a monk like existence- even if it’s only for one day.
David says
January 28, 2007 at 10:41 pmI heard from Pete when he met Paiboon and when Paiboon told him the story about when he ‘realized’ he was a monk. Quite inspiration and now exciting to see photos of Paiboon the Monk.
Kloudiia says
January 29, 2007 at 11:02 pmOMG! I can’t recognise him anymore…
Alvin Soon says
January 29, 2007 at 11:20 pmOMG indeed, Kloudiia 🙂
That’s very good advice anyone can use, Elona!
Nicholas Ong says
February 5, 2007 at 6:51 pmWah… I won’t know that he’s Paiboon had you not mentioned anything.